It’s A Date!

13 Thursday Jun 2013

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We finally have a date to travel!  We have heard from the embassy in Addis, and they have completed the interview with the mom (one last journey to the city for her) and we have an appointment at the embassy for our family interview to obtain visas on June 25th.  This means we are leaving on June 21st!  Yeah!

I’m getting so excited to finally bring them home.  Admittedly, I’m also feeling the nerves, as the reality of our family changing forever becomes measured in increments of time that make sense to me….no more “sometime in early summer” or “sometime in June”.  It’s now something I can put on my calendar, right between piano lessons and baseball tournaments.  As wonderful as that is, there’s no denying the periodic bouts of hyperventilation!  Five kids!  Sheesh!

Jake and Emilie are starting to also get excited.  Em told me that she’s practicing what facial expression she’ll chose when she first meets them.  I asked her if she’ll give the new kids a hug when she meets them, and she said “Just try to stop me!” While Jake can’t wait to meet his new siblings, he’s not as excited to see the city of Addis.  We have been honest with them both about the hard parts of visiting a third world country, trying to prepare them for the sights they’ll see.  He knows it will be tough to see the little ones on the streets begging, as well as boys his own age hustling the streets to clean people’s shoes, working hard to make it on their own.   My sensitive son would rather not see it.  I know how he feels.

We continue to covet your prayers as we travel across the world to get our new kids.

With our friends Tim and Cara in NYC, helping us debrief after our first to Addis.

With our friends Tim and Cara in NYC, helping us debrief after our first to Addis.

Bersisa, Saminas, and Sahye

Bersisa, Saminas, and Sahye

It’s still amazing to me that God is putting this family together the way He is!! If we can just survive the plane trip home!

A Court Date!!!

01 Friday Mar 2013

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We just wanted to  let you that we FINALLY have a court date!!  We are thrilled to pass this great news on to you all, who have been faithfully supporting and praying for us.

Our court date is March 27th.  We need to be in country at least two days prior, so we are leaving Albuquerque on March 22.  It turns out it takes a few days to travel halfway across the world!  That puts us in Ethiopia on Sunday morning. We will catch our breath, and then the next day, Monday, we meet our kids!  We are allowed 2 hours with them on Monday and Tuesday, then Wednesday we go to court and board a plane at 9 pm to fly across the ocean once again.
We will take a few days to enjoy New York City on our way back home, then back to Albuquerque to make final preparations for our expanding family.  Beware, my nesting instincts are likely to go into over-drive!  If you come by, be ready to help organize a closet or scrub baseboards.  Pray for my poor family as they put up with me!  :)
We expect for it to take between 6-8 weeks for the paperwork to be processed and our return trip planned to Ethiopia.  If we have a specific prayer request, besides safe travel, its that our wait time is no longer than 8 weeks between trips. As of June 1, ticket prices for Ethiopian Air go through through the roof.  (Who knew that Ethiopia had a high season?!)  Since we are taking Jake and Emme and bringing back three more, you can imagine just how expensive the second trip  has the potential to be!  Thankfully, God is fully aware of this price hike as well, and will manage the paperwork according to His will.  :)
Thank you so much for your prayers.  It sounds like the kids are doing well, learning English, but ready to join a family…our family.

 

To Ask or Not to Ask

14 Thursday Feb 2013

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Well, we’ve still not heard anything about our court date.  It’s funny to think we had hopes of finding out the day of the bio mom’s court appearance, which was two and a half weeks ago.  The hope was small, but there none-the-less.  I guess we were a bit naive.

As of now, we wake up each morning and sometime before lunch open our email with a new hope that the in box will bear good news; and each morning for the last couple weeks we’ve just shrugged and said, “hopefully tomorrow”.  The good news is that because of the time difference (Addis is 10 hours ahead of Albuquerque), there’s no expectation of hearing anything after about mid-morning, so we don’t have to go through the entire day anticipating.

As I reread what’s been written above so far, it sounds sort of melancholy.  That’s not intentional, and really not at all what we’re trying to convey.  It’s true that we’re disappointed when we don’t see THE email, but it’s even more true that we realize it’s all part of the journey.  And most importantly, it’s ALL in God’s time. His timing is perfect, and the day we get the news will be THE perfect day.  And we’ll scramble, like so many who’ve adopted before us, to get tickets bought and arrangements made; and we’ll go to Ethiopia for the 1st time, and then we’ll come home and wait again for the news that it’s time to go and get them and bring them home. And it will all happen in God’s perfect time.

So, if and when you feel the urge to ask, “have you heard anything?”, please do! Frankly, as time passes, many folks don’t think too much about the adoption, which is completely understandable.  Everyone has busy lives of their own.  So when somebody does ask, it reminds us that they are thinking about, and likely praying for, our kids and the adoption; and that’s a beautiful thing.  We must add, however, when we do hear, you’ll all be the first to know.  We can’t imagine someone asking and us having to respond, “Oh yeah, didn’t we mention…..”.

None-the-less, please ask any time the urge strikes. We’ll be glad you did.

Prayer for Bio Mom’s Court Date

25 Friday Jan 2013

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Friends and family, we have a prayer request….

Tomorrow, which will be the 25th in Addis Ababa, the mom will go to court to sign paperwork relinquishing her rights.  She and the kids will see each other, and there will be, at least a limited understanding for both kids and mom, that this is likely the last time they will see each other.

When we first went to inquire about adoption about a year ago, I remember our social worker telling us that adoption, while wonderful, is always born first from tragedy and loss.  We didn’t fully understand what that meant back then.  We’re starting to now.

Please pray for mom tomorrow.  Pray that she makes it to the capital without any problems.  Pray that the Lord will be a comfort to her.  Pray for her future; pray that giving up her kids will truly be a burden lifted.  Pray for the three kids.  They haven’t seen their mom in over a year.  They will be saying hello and goodbye, all in short time.  Pray that they will have a supernatural peace in their hearts for what their future holds.  Pray that the kids will bond together in both their joy in seeing mom, and their grief in saying goodbye.  I hate that we are so far away from them!  But the Lord is near.

We thank you all, so VERY MUCH for your support of these three kids.  Sometimes, when you hear staggering numbers of orphans who need homes, it’s so overwhelming to even contemplate, much less get involved!  But, lucky you, because you are our friends and family, you are involved!  :)   Its just three kids, three kids in 5 million.  But for these three kids, you are a part of God’s plan for them.

Your love and prayers mean more to us than we can express.

Jana

P.S.  Many of you have heard the song “Home” by Phillip Phillips.  I’ve heard this song a hundred times on the radio, but yesterday, I listened to it with the three kids on my heart, and the lyrics made me cry (which I do a lot lately! J ).  Here they are:

HOME by Phillip Phillips

Hold on to me as we go

As we roll down this unfamiliar road

And although this wave is stringing us along

Jus know you’re not alone

I’m gonna make this place your home

Settle down…it’ll all be clear

Don’t pay no mind to the demons,

They fill you with fear.

The trouble, it might drag you down.

If you get lost, you can always be found

Just know that you’re not alone!

Cause I’m going to make this place your home.

A Date to Celebrate

31 Monday Dec 2012

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Ok, so it’s NOT “that” date, referring to OUR court date.  But, we did get great news that the court date for the biological mother has been set for January 25th.

We were hopeful that we would be traveling to Ethiopia ourselves sometime in January (if not December as we originally hoped); but it now looks like it will be February before we make our first trip (remember that we have to go twice).  That said, we’re excited to have the first required date set, which is the biological mothers scheduled appearance.

So now we’ll pray that she makes it to court on her appointed date and that our appearance will occur shortly after that.

Gotta tell you, we are learning a new kind of patience through this.  It’s particularly tough when we hear first hand from new friends who are adopting from the same orphanage our kids are in (and are in Ethiopia picking up their kids) and they tell us just how ready the kids are to come home to their new family in America.

But we know God’s timing is perfect and He’ll continue to prepare the kids and our family here while we wait to bring them home.  One of the bright sides – more time for nesting by Jana!

What’s In a Name

25 Tuesday Dec 2012

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So many things come up while going through the process of adoption. While they are all worthy investments of time as they are all a means to the end – which of course is to bring our kids home; they are not all “fun”.  But, one of the things we have had fun with is selecting names for our kids.

One thing we knew from the beginning is that we wanted to keep their given names. Even if that meant we needed to adjust the spelling in order to make them more readable or pronounceable in the states.  We felt that even if we had to change the spelling some, we could still honor their heritage; something we want to be sure and encourage, especially since they are coming to us as older children.

The good news is we only needed to adjust their names slightly. We’re excited that the integrity of their names is intact and we can’t wait to share those names with everyone.  The bad news, is that we can’t quite share their names yet.  Not until we’ve been to Ethiopia and gone before the judge will we be able to. BUT, we can share with you the middle names we’ve chosen for each of them.

So here goes:

To the oldest, we’ve given the middle name Lucas – he’s the caretaker and the one who has accepted the responsibility of caring for his younger siblings. And because he’s the oldest child in the orphanage, he seems to be the one the other kids look up to as well. We’ve heard stories of how he’s comforted younger kids who’s adoptive parents have left (two trips are required when adopting from Ethiopia) and encouraged those parents by letting them know he’ll watch after their children. What an amazing little boy.  Lucas means “bringer of light” – seems so fitting given the type of child he is.

To our girl, we’ve given the middle name Raine, which means warrior like, or strong.  She is exactly that.  She seems to be a bit more serious, and one of the things she is most serious about (again, from stories we’ve heard), is taking care of her little brother.  She must be so brave as she’s had to step in to the role of mother.  We’re already so proud of her.

Then there’s the youngest, our little boy, who we’ve given the middle name Tate.  We can’t wait to show you pictures of the kids, and one of the main reasons for that is so you can see his smile.  Seems the smile on his face is always lighting up the world around him.  So, Tate, which means spirited, or happy, was a no brainer.

 

Celebrating Christ

25 Tuesday Dec 2012

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Honestly, we have at least a bit of sadness on this Christmas day.  Please don’t misunderstand, we are blessed and loved beyond our understanding. We’ve been able to spend the days leading up to as well as Christmas day itself with dear friends and family.

The thing is, we had high hopes that this would have been our kids first Christmas  at home.  Being a first time adoptive parent, it could certainly be argued that we’ve been a little naive with regard to our expectations, but we certainly don’t regret our high hopes; and in fact we’ll continue to have them.

We’re still not certain about when our kids will be able to come home, but we do think it will be soon (there’s that hope popping up again!). And we’re grateful that they are safe and well cared for.  In the mean time we’ll cherish the updated pictures we get each week.

But most importantly, we are reminded of what we are celebrating today.  The Christmas story – the story of God’s redemptive love brought to us in the flesh by Jesus.  What an amazing love!

So at least on this day, we’ll set aside any sadness and rejoice in God’s great love. And we’ll remember that He also loves our kids in Ethiopia beyond our understanding.

No room for sadness! We’ll simply be looking forward to next Christmas when we can celebrate together – all 7 of us.

The Minefield of Waiting

17 Monday Dec 2012

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The other night we received updated photos of our three kids from our social worker. This is normally a joyous occasion, to see our kids! But this night, I was hit with a sense of sadness and depression, which quickly turned to anger. What was this about, I wondered? Why I am I mad? Why do I feel almost jealous? I texted a friend who has adopted three children and is familiar with this minefield called waiting. Here is her response, which I wanted to share with family and friends. I’m grateful that she didn’t tell me everything was fine, or she had no idea what I was feeling. Instead, this is what she shared: (all names have been changed)

Yes, I do remember feeling angry about having to wait. Watching the days go by and wondering why they had to endure more time alone.. knowing that everyday meant less time that I would have to teach them, feed them, love them, heal them…on and on. 

I still feel it today. We spent the evening at my sister in laws house. She has a one year old. Her name is Olivia and she was sleeping. It was loud in the house and we didn’t hear her crying. When we finally heard her she was screaming bloody murder and I was all too happy to jump up and rescue her. I rushed into her room and held her close. She was breathing really hard and was soaked with sweat. I sang to her and rocked her but then had this weird jealous anger sweep over me. Who did this for my son when he was hot, scared, hungry, hurting????? Who??? Probably nobody! Who held my daughter and REALLY loved her when her mom peeled her off of her and drove away. Maybe some stranger in a nanny uniform! It feels soooooo wrong! I want to cry INJUSTICE!!!!!! I wanted to hold my own child NOT my niece who has several Aunties, Grandmas and a loving mama ALREADY! 

I passed Olivia off to my mother in law.

Those are my weak moments. They are also moments that remind me of how blessed I am. I realize how much I love these children even though they are not bone of my bone or flesh of my flesh. These moments cause me to ponder the amazing details that God organized in order to place them in my home. They make me LOVE Psalm 139!!!!!!! Go read it… and then marvel and rest in your children’s creator and caregiver.

So… Yup I had those feelings and still do. Tonight was down right ugly. But rejoice friend!!!! God has called you to something huge! His timing is perfect. He is preparing their hearts as well as yours.(EX being ticked that they are growing without you is a refection of bonding. Hooray!) 

I will pray for you and your kiddos tonight.

SomeONE’s missing

26 Monday Nov 2012

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So we spent today putting up Christmas lights outside and this evening decorating the Christmas tree and the rest of the house. And let me tell you, a circus act with umpteen clowns getting out of the bug has nothing on us as we set up the assembly line (of sorts) to get the Christmas stuff out of the attic. WOW that’s a lot of Christmas stuff.  Yet somehow, 95% of it has some special meaning to our family (or to Jana’s decorating plans) – either way there’s no way we’ll throw it out.

So fun was certainly had. Jacob and Emilie jubilantly filled the tree with “ornaments with meaning and not just regular ole’ ornaments” (according to Jacob) as the Christmas music blared.  It really was a great evening.  The kind that isn’t necessarily earth shatteringly memorable; but absolutely meaningful to our family.

BUT, that’s just it. Our family is not complete.  Though we didn’t dwell on it, we certainly were all aware that we can’t wait to do this again in 2013.  Only this time we will be complete. All SEVEN of us.

Thanksgiving and the Referral

26 Monday Nov 2012

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Thanksgiving is such a great time of year. An opportunity to devour lot’s of wonderful food, spend time with our families doing the things we love to do – whether that be watching football, playing football, playing games around the dining table or simply hanging out and catching up, and spend time reflecting on the things we’re thankful for.  These are all things our family was blessed to partake in this Thanksgiving.  But, this year we are most thankful for the “referral”, which came the day before Thanksgiving – what timing!

This means that after about a year of adoption “stuff” – paperwork, home study completion, dossier assembly (that was fun!), fundraising (which we’re still working on), etc., we have finally received our official referral.

The referral can mean something a bit different depending on the path one takes to adopt a child.  Often times it is the beginning of ones relationship with a child or children.  In other words, it represents the initial introduction to a child that a family is to consider adopting.  Whereas in our case, we’ve known who we would be adopting for several months now and have been working towards bringing them home.  In this case, the referral means they are officially ours! Of course we’ve thought of them as ours for months, but now it’s official.  We do still have to go to Ethiopia and appear in court, and we’ll trust the Lord to prepare the way for that part of the process to go smoothly.

But except for the small little issue of traveling to Ethiopia twice :>) much of the work has been completed.  We’ll now wait for a court date to be set, which we hope will set for sometime in mid December.  As soon as that date is set, we’ll be booking our tickets to Addis Ababa.  We’re (especially Jacob and Emilie) hoping that we won’t have to be away from home on Christmas, but will go whenever we need to in order that we can get our kids home as soon as possible.

A memorable Thanksgiving for sure….

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